Fight or flight

Finally this day is coming. I’m seating near the window, looking at the night sky outside. I have a mixed feeling, really. All this waiting, all this excitement and all this fear, become together as once.

I really don’t know if it’s the right decision or not. I pray for this a long time, I carried this feeling for almost 2 years. I want to surrender now for the choose that I’ve chosen. Wondering what next, give me a deeper meaning of life lesson.

Guide all of things I have left for this two months. I know that I can’t hold both ways, too many, too busy and chaotic. I should fight, I should enjoy, I should live.

But here I’m sitting alone, crying because it’s hard to have no one beside you when you’re fighting. God bless.