my another prayer

i learned something from my senior,

she wears tattoo, so many tattoo,

she smoke, pierced, i see her not like a good person,

but today when i see her account on Twitter,

i just realize that appearance is nothing, make up is nothing, all from outside is nothing

she believed in God,

she thinks the right,

she try do the best,

she thanks to God many times.

appearance maybe just like a shield for her to keep her safe, keep her looks like a champion,

who's looking inside?

when maybe nothing good things left, a heart will still be there, right?

one of her tweets,

better have heart than words

word can be like a cake,

smile can be like a candy, 

so sweet,

but who see the heart inside?

is somebody be honest? when she says thanks, only thanks will be there?

But, i know that God really knows.

So here God, i beg You,

help me to don't judge anybody, or make a rate of them,

everybody has reason for their act or her appearance..

so do i.

i don't want make a mask on my face,

in this life, in this world,

i don't care when life play us,

i don't care when life dump us, when there's no justice,

but i want beg You,

help me to be honest with my self,

no fake smile, no fake word, no fake lies,

thanks God,

for all Your kindness, although i still struggle fulfill my 'own' happiness,

but all Yours, i am Yours,

just be who You want me to be, God.

not who I want me to be.

with thankful,

Jakarta 16 June 2013